The one thing that causes unhappiness...

So, here I am, thinking things are going well. And let me tell ya, they aren't. You think you know yourself. You think you understand yourself and have some self-awareness. You think you can live without attachment:

The one thing that causes unhappiness…

If you look carefully you will see that there is one thing and only one thing that causes unhappiness. The name of that thing is attachment. What is an attachment? An emotional state of clinging caused by the belief that without some particular thing or some person you cannot be happy.

— Anthony de Mello

And then, what happens? You realize you miss the place you swore you would not. You miss the people who not only watched you grow into who you are, but the people who helped you along the way. In truth, you miss what was and what never can be again. Things change, people move, tears fall.

So, here I am left without a clue. I think this is what I want to do. I know this is what I wanted to do. I am just not sure if the time to do it is this very moment. But then I think, why wait? Seize the opportunities before you. I try to convince myself that it is just the stretch of days before classes begin (Tuesday) that is making me think so much...nope, wrong. I ALWAYS think too much. Perhaps after I become acclimated to the area, I will love it. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps...

but who wants to live for perhaps?